The first major drama series to come from McBeeb since Monarch of the Glen. Can hope spring eternal?
Ellie Langdon (ER’s Alex Kingston) has just been released from prison following a three year sentence for a crime her mobster husband committed. Coming to the end of her term, Ellie discovers that her criminal husband’s moral-fibre might not be all it’s cracked up to be – her evidence for such a view being his secret partner and kid. Tough news after dwindling away three years for the sod, I’m sure.
‘Angered, feisty and fabulous’, Ellie calls upon three ex-con friends and, in the most unbelievable manner possible, frames him good and proper – whilst relieving him of £3 million pounds in the process. Girl power is restored!
Hmm. Sounds good, doesn’t it? Almost like The Hustle meets Charlie’s Angels. Slightly pedestrian conceptually, yes, but overall befitting of a good BBC drama. In fact, it sounds like a guaranteed hit, just so long as they don’t move the four girls up to a small Scottish village, have them invest some of their £3 million pounds in a modest hotel business only to have an angsty teenager blow their cash to smithereens in a fire. That’d just turn a solid drama into a cheap, 1970s fish-out-of-water sitcom, wouldn’t it?
Yes. Yes, it would.
Quite how something so convoluted and laughable made its way to our screens is quite beyond me. I can only imagine them going for a quirky, Desperate Housewives type of tone, but none of that’s apparent in a comedy/drama that hasn’t decided whether it’s either.
First off, there’s the cast (not as Scottish as a Scottish production should have, but I did notice the Asian bloke from Chewin’ the Fat being all actory). One minute they’re camping it up like they’re in Sex and the City, the next we’re enduring a village ensemble that at times looks worthy of Straw Dogs but mostly HeartBeat. We skip from malevolence to light relief in what could have been quite an intelligent and intoxicating way – but isn’t because the script’s a steaming pile of Angus poo.
Leaving aside the fact the initial con is performed in a public place, around CCTV cameras, their movements in the airport, following the death of an obese person on a baggage carousel are pathetic for a group of hardened gangster types. I mean, who goes up to the highlands to flee the law these days? Is this the 39 Steps? You can’t just hop onto the Flying Scotsman and expect everything to be fine and dandy. Not only are Scotch villages not full of kilted Barbarians sleeping in straw beds anymore, the place isn’t that remote either – what with the invention of the internal combustion engine. And, besides, why would you buy a bleeding hotel with some of your money? Why not buy something like, say, a house instead? That way you aren’t making toasties for all and sundry whilst you lay low.
The whole drama’s a mess.
But, hey. As someone currently living in Dumfries and Galloway, I can testify that the crew filming the show have injected some much needed cash into the region’s economy. And that’s Hope Springs’ one saving grace. Would have been better if they’d made a show good enough for a recommission – but there you go. The girls were varying levels of attractive, but I doubt that’s quite enough for the female demographic.
Perhaps they should have used said springs to water down the premise a little?
46 Comments
Does Alex play a character called “Hope”? Or is the village called “Hope Springs”?
Think Cape Wrath.
Sorry – I should pay closer attention. The village is called “Hope Springs”.
Of course it is.
I caught the end of it and Heartbeat seemed to sum it up… horrible incidental music and crap villain.
I “hope” the hotel called something like the Fools Rush Inn.
The score verged on blaxploitation in parts. No idea why. Perhaps it’s for the benefit of those who call blaxpoitation Tarantino-esque.
I wouldn’t know.
Sounds rubbish.
Pilchard – There’s a similar hotel right opposite myself and they have a Fawlty Towers sign round the back, they put it up during festivals for the tourists.
Should I steal it? I want a Fawlty Towers sign.
I’m going to steal it.
Dave – So you’ve lost your job, you’re living with your mother on the dole, and now you’re considering crime? Your life is a textbook case.
Dave – steal the hotel and leave the sign.
I may have to work up a pitch for my new series “Peterhead”, about a man called Peter, who has a head.
You’ve missed out my crystal meth habit and inappropriate tendency to stand by cash points, bottle of cider in hand, swearing aggressively at passers by.
Do you remember ‘Herman’s Head’? That was fun, wasn’t it?
I need an ex-ER star to appear on my new 8-parter called “Wick”. It’s about some people who run away to the north of Scotland in order to build a giant candle (in hopes of attracting giant moths, which they can then catch and kill for their silk). Is Scott Grimes available?
You’d have to go to a Scotch island for that size of giant moth. St Kilda, perhaps?
Attack of the Kilda (Killer) Moths?
Are there giant moths in Scotchland? I know there’s them stinking midges things, but giant moths? No wonder they’re all drunks up there. I would be if I had a country full of giant moths.
Are they Nazi moths?
The BBC press release for Hope Springs sayeth:
“However, by a cruel twist of fate, the glamorous girls end up in hiding in Hope Springs, a small Scottish Highland village, without any money, any passports or indeed any hope.”
Excellent use of the word “indeed” there, I think. You can almost hear the blurb writer’s eyes sliding upwards towards the clock on the wall.
No. All the Nazi moths were stabbed int he face for being Nazis. Scotland’s livestock all seem to lean towards the far right – perhaps they’ve been voting this past week.
I’m not a total expert on the giant moths thing. But the business opportunities for farming giant moths could be attractive. Before they’re slaughtered, you could tie ropes to their ankles, so they flew in circles, thereby generating electricity.
You could probably generate enough juice to replace the giant candle too.
Sigh. I already miss the giant candle.
That’s the good folk of Yorkshire and Lancashire, Dave. It’s nice to know that the inhabitants of my part of the world are just as racist and stupid as they were when I was a boy. Shows us northern types in a good light, what what?
I’m a Mancunian, Napoleon. Nothing like stirring up racial tension in what was previously a safe, multicultural environment.
FACT: TV’s long-running oil family drama “Dallas” was set in the village of Dallas, in Aberdeenshire. However, the LA-based producers couldn’t find any stock footage of the Scottish Dallas for the exterior scenes, so they substituted with film taken in the Texas city of the same name. But all the interiors, and the pool/patio area, and Lucy, were closely modelled on the Scottish originals.
The press release also says:
“Hope Springs is a sparklingly modern fish-out-of-water comedy drama set against the stunning backdrop of gorgeous Scottish scenery.”
The most authentically Scottish part of this sentence is the word “fish”.
*Wishes someone would call him sparklingly modern
Coming from Bradford, I have no recollection of a multicultural society. I just remember everybody hating everybody else in an architectural wasteland full of no-go areas, litter, dog-shit and dereliction.
The curries were nice, mind.
this sounded shite dave, so nice to have it confirmed that it is indeed … shite.
Still, I have a bit of a crush on alex kingston from her ER days – with her posh voice and lovely curly hair.
Is she still all nice and posh and lovely? I hope so, though unfortunately thats still not enough of a reason to watch it.
and the one on the right looks a bit like nene cherry.
“…fish out of water comedy…” says it all..
i can’t be doing with alex kingston. no. not a bit.
morning all.
Morning. New podcast in 20 mins or so.
*thud*
I can hardly wait.
I’m being followed on Twitter by ‘The Real Nick Griffin’. It’s clearly not the real Nick Griffin, but some of its followers are clearly sailing very close to the wind of actual Nick Griffinism. I did like the comment that Britain should back out of the International Space Station.
is it a good podcast?
is it?
I’ve heard rumours that’s it breaks new ground in rank amateurism, Breeks.
Alex Kingston has a MASSIVE face.
Me and Bree and piqued met Mel last night. She is real.
NC – re bratfud. I concur*
*which is the sort of word that gets you beaten up in bradders, for speaking posh.
IS Nick Griffin real?
Has the new podcast got Naps in it?
Are you a bit in love with Naps, Nick?
You can tell us if you are – we won’t laugh.
Yes, he is.
What is Mel like? Is she a goth? Or is she a punk rocker? Or is she a business woman?
Roszs – I was accused of being a ‘clever bastard’ on my last visit to Bratfudd. Silly me for daring to utter the word ‘parameters’ in mixed, Bradfordian company. The dumb shits.
Nick – I might be in this one. Somewhere at the back, near the toilets.
Swineshead – You’ve missed out the other possible choice for what a woman could be – a housewife.
And speaking of housewives, where the hell’s Clair (Edna) gone?
SH – she is an unlikely mixture of all three (minus the goth and punk rocker and business woman bits).
He makes me laugh SH, but don’t tell him.
I’ve got it into my head that Mel’s like Melanie Griffith – voice that sounds like she’s been sucking on helium, a mane of permed blonde hair and a really nice ass.
I see Piqued’s skiving off again.
i once got cornered by a friend’s husband (who was bashing her up and i had the temerity to say to her maybe she should think about whether being bashed up was a positive life choice) who accused me of bringing my ‘book-learning’ to his house and using it to ‘make my wife smart’.
he was a moron. she is now divorced.
mel is deffo real. as is roszser. and, strangely, piqued’s beard.
I was in an argument in Bradford once, and the other person accused me of trying to prove my point with “facts”.
NEW PODCAST POST ALERT
One of my favourites is when you’re accused of using ‘big words’. I always like to offer ‘em a couple of small words instead: ‘fuck’ and ‘off’.
I only watch Hope Springs for Alec Newman.
He is very good actor.