Proper EastEnders fans will be aware that we’re coming up to the 25th anniversary of what is undeniably the greatest ‘long-running drama serial’ on the box.
And we’re also aware that they’re celebrating the anniversary with a live episode. And in that live episode, Archie Mitchell’s killer will be revealed…
Huzzah!
Ian Beale’s been discussing his and Phil Mitchell’s fear of collapse over the live episode excitement in an interview with The Mirror:
“I can’t wait for it. I want to see the director’s face when I leave a huge pause between lines. It’ll be bleedin’ hysterical.
“Parts of the set are falling to pieces because it’s been standing for 25 years. I think it was only ever designed to last for 15. But it’s been patched up in time for next week.”
“We’ve all got our little strategies in case it goes wrong. I’m going upstairs to check on Bobby. Steve Mac is going to say, ‘I’ve had enough of this’ and just walk out.”
Should be fun.
*end of football comment*
161 Comments
Actually it is a “cereal” (rather than serial) because the first ones were sponsored by breakfast cereal manufacturers.
More game-saving moves in case of disaster:
Christian orders four sausages in the caff
Jim goes “Yeah, yeah”
Fat Pat and Patrick have full penetrative sex on Arthur’s Bench
I’d like to congratulate Dorothy Branning for belting that weird 1940s kid of Nick’s after she tried to make it look like Jim had wazzed in his trousers. Hopefully, this’ll signal a general return to hitting children across the country, the absence of which has turned an entire generation into disrespectful little bastards.
Pat Pat and Patrick – what position?
As for Dotty Branning – she definitely did deserve that thumop – but mainly because she’s a deviant forty year old woman in the body of a child.
Every which way but loose, Swines.
Every time I see Dotty, I expect to hear air raid sirens going off in the background, followed in short order by the sounds of anti-aircraft guns pounding away and the whine of doodlebugs falling from the sky.
JRME – Hurrrrr
Nappers – she has got a touch of the blitz about her. is she more annoying than Abby?
I wouldn’t say she’s as annoying, no. More peculiar because she’s clearly a time-traveller from 1940. I’m surprised Dot doesn’t keep finding her in the cupboard under the stairs, sheltering from Hitler’s bombers and wolfing down powdered egg.
I’m pleased to admit that I have no bleedin’ idea what you are all on about.
Thanks.
Me neither….
*returns to Archers forum*
Nice blog post NC, by the way. You didn’t mention the late-night meat cravings, I see…
It’s snowing BTW
It was snowing in EC2 about 2 hours ago, then hail, then sleet, and now it’s sunny. Kwazy!
Thanks, Fourstar. No, I didn’t mention the meat cravings as I can assure you the missus ain’t up the duff.
Anyway … EC2? Is that one of those new towns they built in the ’60s? Or a nightclub?
Same here 4*, all manner of different weather that changes by the minute. At the moment , bright sunshine.
Oh haven’t you heard? It’s all alphanumeric down here now. Yes, the government introduced it, makes life a whole lot easier. So I’m 36877827, working in EC2, living in SE6, drinking too much C2H5OH and not getting enough C6H8O6.
Sounds like Einstein’s typo
Im in W4 F* and it’s snowing AND sunny at the same time -it makes NO SENSE!!!
Out of interest, where’s that Mayhem woman?
Tragic canoeing accident. I noted it through my telescope but neglected to call the coastguard.
It’s snowing and sunny in Yorkshire too. Sadly I spent half of the morning waiting for a 5 minute appointment at the job centre. There was a man with a tattoo on his face. I was a little scared.
What job do you think he was applying for Jamie?
It’s both snowing and sunny in S3 too. And we’ve got the interesting spectacle of a bunch of shaven-headed baboons nailing garish no parking signs to every available surface.
I went to the jobcentre a few times last year. They still haven’t given me a bean, the swines.
I’m not sure, Interceptor. I tried to avoid eye contact with him in case he beat me up. I don’t generally judge people based on looks, but when someone’s chosen to have a bladdy big tattoo all over their visage, I think it’s safe to question this philosophy.
Not even a bean???
I always think people wot get tattoos all over their faces are making a bold statement. To whit:
“To hell with employment! I’m happy with £42 a week, thanks very much!”
Not even magic beans? I reckon it depends on what the tatto is actually of Jamie – what if you had your HGV license permanantly etched there for convinience?
Wise words Nap…and the bloke behind the jc desk doesn’t even have to wonder why you ain’t got a job…
Anyway i thought these days you get a luxury house and more money than you know what to do with if you sign on. Even more if you come from abroad.
Yup, I’m certainly living the high life on my disability benefits. Lobster every day, and a holiday home in the US, just like the Daily Mail say. I pity those fools able to work proper!
I’m not sure what the tattoo was actually of, Interceptor – like I say I tried to avoid eye contact but it was black and blue – unless it was just a tattoo-shaped bruise
DINLT – You couldn’t make it up, what you’ve just said. These immigrants, coming over, picking sprouts at six in the morning, living in unsafe terraced houses with sixty other immigrants, getting threatened and paid under minimum wage bygreedy gangmasters, getting murthered for being foreigners by ignoramouses … THEY DON’T KNOW HOW FUCKING LUCKY THEY ARE.
I understand they also killed Diana, the bastards.
There are two types of tattoo wearers.
The ones who have the trendy one on the ankle or bum or somewhere.
Then there are the ones who have the real deal, and yes one does act cautiously around.
I have an all-over tattoo of myself but taller. That foxed the DHSS when they tried to follow me to my part-time plastering job I can tell you
Jamie – I’d remove your benefits, you SCROUNGER. It’s your lot wot’s ruined this country (alongside the young, immigrants, wimmin’s libbers and what-have-you) and you should all be thrown in forced labour camps.
I may have a problem in a labour camp, Naps as after two minutes of work I’d more than likely collapse. Maybe forced euthenasia would be a better option for the likes of me – could save money on benefits, and provide jobs for the ones what do the killing, like.
Nap..why are they picking sprouts at six in the morning? It is a bit dark ain’t it? I think they should start a bit later.
No, no, later on they are picking cockles. Or something.
Spaggers – I’ve heard this. Apparently the Archbishop of Canterbury teamed up with MI5 and Prince Philip to murther Diana because she was seeing a Mooslim from off of foreign parts. They say Our Windy Candle was going to have his baby, and there’s no way this country could of put up with an Islamical fella on the throne if everyone else in the Royal Family died (like in King Ralph) and he inherited, not with our business dealings with Israel, oh no. They had to die, do you see? THEY HAD TO.
Quite right too.
Jamie – I agree. Your lot (the ill) deserve to be euthanised to save us all money. We could spend the sudden surplus on getting Jim Davidson’s career back on track … and bringing back hanging and Maggie!
DINLT – All farming begins ridiculously early. You, an urban scrote with no knowledge of our country ways, don’t know this because you’re too busy disappearing up your own arsehole as a poncified city type.
I heeard it was all filmed in a studio and they basically just wanted the oil.
Napoleon – You really do need to stop listening to Jeremy Vine you know. Step away from the radio.
I’ll have you know Nap, i am well versed in the ways of the land. Indeed I am well known for my euro peasent ways. I maintain, for all picking you need to be able to see what you are doing. Planting can be done in the moonlight, especially tomatoes!
DINLT – put some string around your knees, then you’ll look the part. And guzzle zoider.
Dotty from EE would fit right in Fallout 3 or Bioshock. You wait till her eyes cloud over and a Big Daddy lumbers through the wall and drills through Jim’s head.
A new shop is opening two doors down from my house. I walked past this morning and saw that it was going to be a tattoo parlour, and thought “Oh no, what about the price of my house? It’ll be negatively affected!”
I think I now have to actually kill myself, don’t I?
Unless JRME you market your house to tatoo enthusiasts.
“Nice house in surburban road, close to the tatoo parlour”.
Jamie – It’s these immigrants, I tell you.
DINLT – I disagree. You’re too busy trying to act the Big I Am by boasting about owning an iPhone to know about our country ways. It’s also your sort wot banned fox-hunting because you don’t understand our country ways.
Its all different these days anyway. John Lewis in Oxford St. has a tattooist. It’s trendy these days.
Napoleon – I hate to break it to you but you don’t live in the country, do you?
It’s snowing again in Yorkshire.
Jamie – You don’t understand my country ways.
That’s a great idea, DINLT. This one does seem to be a good old-school one though, rather than the John Lewis tiny chinese character type: there’s black+purple velvet pictures of women with bog boobs and wolves and that stuff on the walls.
Who’s got a tat then? I think 3 of you have. I have.
*big boobs. Obviously.
That’s the third time I’ve said that sentence today.
How far is the nearest farm from you Nap? You pretend to be well versed in the country ways but you sit about drawing all day, in your steel town penthouse apartment by the docks. Very rural.
Again how far is the nearest farm? I am within a mile and half of a farm, perhaps nearer.
I haven’t got a tattoo because I’m neither in prison nor am I a sailor. And - present company excepted, JRME – all wimmin with tattoos are harlots.
DINLT – I am within a mile and a quarter of a farm. You’d understand this if you understood our country ways.
Is it farm Top Trumps? I have one within half a mile – it’s got cows and horses and a tractor anyway, so I assume it’s some sort of farm.
*considers getting a tattoo*
*recalls that Robbie Williams has tattoos*
*rejects idea*
JRME is your tattoo either on your ankle, bum, or shoulder? You are one of the new trendy types who has a tat.
A real tattoo is one that marks out your criminal gang and how many years you spent inside.
I’ve got a tat I’m afraid – I get bored easily…
Right, well I am off to wander the local fields and get some lunch.
Of course you’ve got a tattoo, Interceptor. That’s what your sort (sheep-like followers of fly-by-night fads) does. I’ll wager it’s something off of the ’80s, is it? Something ironic like the Thundercats symbol or the Commodore logo?
FRICKIN’ AWESOME!
Afternoon all.
JRME – Have you really? I don’t have any. I am fascinated by them but hate them in equal measure. I gave up smoking (which I LOVED) to prevent Mr Clarry from getting one.
The minute he goes and drunkenly gets a tattoo I’m taking up the fags again, oh yes…
I guess that Piqued might have one (actually, he definitely has one, he was all disappointed with it on his blog or summat) and I think Nick might have one (either as a youth or very recently – prob also has his ear pierced). Errrrm, who else? Maybe DINLT and 4*. Yeah, I bet 4* will have a trendy one. Also maybe Mel?
Fairly sure Naps and Swines wouldn’t have them.
I definitely don’t imagine Breeks, Mr Green, Jamie, Dave or JQW having them. Oh or Pilch.
DINLT – I’d be careful out there in the countryside. You don’t understand its ways.
P.S I wrote all my guesses before I saw all your posts above.
‘There are two types of tattoo wearers.
The ones who have the trendy one on the ankle or bum or somewhere.
Then there are the ones who have the real deal, and yes one does act cautiously around.’
Sweet Christ, what utter rot!
It’s an octopus Naps, given to me by a strange be-dreaded crusty in my formative years. Actually a commodore logo would be great, although I’m not sure if I’d want it on my joystick…
P.S I am writing this from next door to a farm.
*wins*
*closes window to prevent smell of shit blowing in the window*
the only thing you need to know about country ways are how boring, cold and smelly thay are all the time. Escape as soon as you can and never go back that’s my advice!
You are right Clarry – I’m far too cleancut to have a tattoo. Though the missus has one on her back which neither her parents or my parents know about.
Don’t tell them.
You are indeed right Clarry.
I’m planning a new one in September
You can’t get better than a Kwik Fit Fitter
You can’t get better than a Kwik Fit Fitter
You can’t get better than a Kwik Fit Fitter
We’re the boys to trust!
So to CLARRYfy:
I guess that Piqued might have one (actually, he definitely has one, he was all disappointed with it on his blog or summat) and I think Nick might have one (either as a youth or very recently – prob also has his ear pierced) CORRECT. Errrrm, who else? Maybe DINLT and 4*. Yeah, I bet 4* will have a trendy one. Also maybe Mel?
Fairly sure Naps and Swines wouldn’t have them.
I definitely don’t imagine Breeks, Mr Green, Jamie CORRECT, Dave or JQW having them. Oh or Pilch.
Anyway, we seem to have wandered somewhat from the original post.
Come on people, focus – don’t want to get accused of being spammers again. What do we think about…..er….*forgets what original post was now*
Piqued – You fall into DINLT’s trendy types category of tattooed fools. You spend your life desperately trying to be trendy, which is why you’ve moved with the herd to next trendy London trendy hotspot, why you have trendy tattoos, why you wear trendy designer glasses and it’s why you wear trendy clothes designed for someone half your age.
You also have no understanding of our country ways.
You are indeed right Clarry.
I’m planning a new one in September
That better Clarry?
*kisses NC on the mouth*
Shhhhhhh, you lovely man
I acknowledged what you said Nick and added the CORRECT result next to your name. That list will be added to as and when other people let me know whether I guessed right or not.
Oh yeah I can add Nap to the list.
I guess that Piqued might have one (actually, he definitely has one, he was all disappointed with it on his blog or summat) CORRECT and I think Nick might have one (either as a youth or very recently – prob also has his ear pierced)CORRECT. Errrrm, who else? Maybe DINLT and 4*. Yeah, I bet 4* will have a trendy one. Also maybe Mel?
Fairly sure Naps CORRECT and Swines wouldn’t have them.
I definitely don’t imagine Breeks, Mr Green, Jamie CORRECT, Dave or JQW having them. Oh or Pilch.
Clarry, I have a few, and you’re right about SH, though I think NC does actually have one…
Sorry, Piqued, was that a trendy new way of responding to something? Did you read about it in the Guardian?
It is admittedly on my backside. But it’s not a Chinese characeter or one of them swirly gaelic things or anything rubbish like that. It’s a completely meaningless round symbol thing. I can’t see it, like, so I often forget it’s there for months at a time, until I catch a glimpse in a mirror and think it’s a spider or something and have a complete mental screaming fit and try and claw my own skin off.
Hi Clarry! I thought roughly the same as you, apart from I bet that Breeks has one, and not Mel. Not Naps, not Swines. I guessed Mr Green would.
Interceptor: an octopus is a *great* tattoo idea. Is you avatar a picture of it?!?!?!?
I don’t have a tattoo, Piqued. I’m capable of amateurishly doodling rubbish onto my flesh without assistance, and because I’m not a trendified idiot like you, I can wash off the results when I grow bored of them.
I let a few more people fess up before I amend the list again.
WHat about Roszs?
NC, what was that on your ar…
JESUS, SEE A DOCTOR!
*high fives JRME*
Actually, can I change one entry? I think Dave is the prime candidate for the ironic Thundercats type tattoo.
I forgot to mention, Clarry, that you DON’T win. Despite living next door to a farm, you’re a dreadful citified urbanite type who wouldn’t know our country ways if they kicked you up your arse.
Unfortunately my tattoo doesnt quite match my Gravatar for sheer idiocy Justresting – but it’s close…
Anyone on here one of those awful record-collecting nerd type characters? I need to draw something you’d play a newly released copy of Back In Black on, so it needs to be a machine from off of 1980.
Thanks, in advance, for doing my research work for me.
In what way am I a dreadful citified urbanite type, Naps?
I have NO tattoo! well guessed, Clarry. Have you been using your detective skills again?
I OFFICIALLY served in the Merchant Navy for 11 days. Does that make me a sailor (I also go sailing occasionally)?
Clarry – With your city folk ways, that’s in what way. You wouldn’t know us country folk and our ways because you’re too busy with your ways, which are citified urbanite city ways and not our ways (which you don’t understand).
Naps, there you go:
http://www.audiokarma.org/forums/showthread.php?t=117691
Huzzah!
Hi Mr Green – that’s going to be my new profession I think. Jamie, if you’re unemployed, do you want to be my sidekick?
So that’s:
I guess that Piqued might have one (actually, he definitely has one, he was all disappointed with it on his blog or summat)CORRECT and I think Nick might have one (either as a youth or very recently – prob also has his ear pierced) CORRECT. Errrrm, who else? Maybe DINLT and 4*. Yeah, I bet 4* will have a trendy one. Also maybe Mel?
Fairly sure Naps CORRECT and Swines CORRECT wouldn’t have them.
I definitely don’t imagine Breeks, Mr Green CORRECT, Jamie CORRECT, Dave or JQW having them. Oh or Pilch.
Thanks, Thumps! At last, Watch With Mothers has proved useful for something!
Shame you don’t understand our ways, Thumps.
*eyes Thumps, slandenticular-fashion*
I actually grew up in a rural area (Scotch Highlands) so I understand Country Ways very well.
Which is one reason why I moved as far away as possible
I may lose my piercings soon.
When I get to an age (as determined by Mrs Nick) when they no longer suit me.
My piercings disappeared when the hair came off nick -baldness and earrings=Ming the Mercyless unfortunately…
Damn, I got Mr Green wrong.
OK, I think everyone should change their avatars to pics of their tattoo, or bare patches of their BORING BORING skin. Apart from Clarry who can do a picture of whatever she wants for winning the tattoo competition.
*tries to take photo of own arse*
*realises she’s at work*
*camera smashes itself to million pieces for some reason*
I will gladly be your sidekick, Clarry. We could be like Holmes and Watson, though maybe a little less gay than in the Guy Ritchie film.
What kind of Tattoo did you think I had, JRME?
I don’t understand how you grew up in the Highlands, Thumps. How come your lot wasn’t thrown out along with all the other squatters? Is your family in service?
*waits for JRME to get home so she can post picture of her arse*
‘What kind of Tattoo did you think I had, JRME?’
Oooh, can I play?
I come from a coastal town, and it wasn’t economical for the Landlords to throw us out and put sheep there instead, probably because they kept drowning.
More importantly -what kind of tattoo do we think Mr.Green has?
I see. Couldn’t they have kicked your lot out and put up nets to catch the sheep? Seems a waste of good land, having it infested with Scotch squatters.
Everyone can play!
What kind of Tattoo did you think Mr. Green had/should have?
I neither have a tattoo, nor did i have my ear pierced when everybody else did.
I do not consider myself to be “square” but have never followed trends.
I have exactly no tattoos, Clarry. Considered it a few times, but decided to remain uninked. Can’t see it happening now, although I am 40 next year so MID-LIFE CRISIS AHOY!
Can’t you just kick out the wife and kids, get y’self a teenage girlfriend (street-legal), spend your savings on a motorbike and start dressing like Piqued, Fourstar? At least you won’t regret those actions.
Also, they’re playing that bloody John Lennon song on the radio. Not Nobody’s Got Anything Any More, the other one. The one about being on your uppers, but it not being all that bad once you get used to it. I think it’s called It’s Alright, This, Being On Your Uppers.
i do sometimes wear a bandana Nils Lofgren style though. (Another facet of my cowboy country ways).
I do find some tattoos on some women quite sexy.
That’s knackered my stats…
So that’s:
I guess that Piqued might have one (actually, he definitely has one, he was all disappointed with it on his blog or summat)CORRECT and I think Nick might have one (either as a youth or very recently – prob also has his ear pierced) CORRECT. Errrrm, who else? Maybe DINLT INCORRECT and 4* INCORRECT. Yeah, I bet 4* will have a trendy one. Also maybe Mel?
Fairly sure Naps CORRECT and Swines CORRECT wouldn’t have them.
I definitely don’t imagine Breeks, Mr Green CORRECT, Jamie CORRECT, Dave or JQW having them. Oh or Pilch.
I found Tatu quite sexy
Oh, no actually I didn’t – I just found them annoying
I don’t have any tats, piercings, implants or lean-to conservatory-style brick extensions.
Having said that, few of my teeth are my own and I can only see an inch and a half without optical aids. All in all, I’m quite a catch.
Pilchard= a catch…very good.
Personally I think it’s not something to be done half heartedly. Either go for it or don’t bother.
My worst are those weird ones grown up women get, of something like winnie the pooh or tigger.
I also think it’s a massive mistake to have writing or anything that will, invariably, go out of trend i.e. tribal, barbed wire, Chinese symbols etc.
I fancy barbed wire wrapped round a totem pole with Chinese charac…..oh
Didn’t you know grown ups are toddlers these days, Clarry? That’s the only reason I’ve got to explain an apparently grown women in a pink anorak and hat with bear ears with a Winnie the Pooh bag who lives in my block of flats … sorry, city living appartment cuboid.
Totally agree, Clarry, that’s why I got something that meant nothing then and means nothing now. I was only 19 at the time anyway so that’s my excuse.
Mr Green: I imagined you look like yon geezer from IT Crowd cos of my lack of imagination, so…a snake winding round your upper leg leading onto and along your personal regions? Seems apt. Plus you could make it rear up and stuff!
I’m gonna go and pitch that as an idea to the new tattoo parlour.
I like a man in glasses, Pilch. *adds Pilch to list*
Good God Naps… really?
Another score there for correctly guessing about Pilch.
*punches air*
I also don’t get the weird ear tunnel things.
http://i43.tinypic.com/117edkh.jpg%22%20border=%220
I guess they will just have to have the flappy bit cut off, when they are sick of their ears killing all day and fed up of not being able to rest their heads on a pillow properly.
*knew she had a list*
You ought to see my list Nick…
Hmm, now how to subtly drop into conversation the fact that I wear glasses?
yep, that should do it.
I wear glasses too!
Ought I?
OUGHT I?
***GOes off to the optician.
Hold on JRME…what about those reading glasses you can buy in newsagents these days. Will that do?
***goes off to buy reading glasses.
No, probably not Nick…
Those bastard ‘ravers’ should show this national monument some more bloody respect.
If I said I found weird ear tunnel things (wot I mentioned ^ up there ^) devilishly attractive, would any of you bother getting it done?
I find good tattoos on women incredibly attractive.
Peaches Geldof’s inky car-crash, not so much.
Even the best tattoo in the world looks a bit crappy after a few years, and will look positively dreadful in later life.
This is a disgrace, it underlines everything that is wrong with Broken Britain. The site should be restored with a government grant, perhaps teenagers with asbos could be made to work for nothing there as part of their “community service”.
- Dan, Enfield, Middlesex, 16/10/2009 17:49
I’ve got a tattoo of one of those ear tubes…
does that get me on to your list Clarry?
I kid you not, Clarry. About half the wimmin on this estate … sorry, riverside urban development dress like five year olds. There’s even one girl (Ug boots, bear ear hat, Tigger’s severed head for a backpack etc.) wot walks like a kiddie going off to school, all waddling along and skipping and that. I think she’s about thirty (she could be mentally retarded).
Thats the thing Clarry…having drunk beer with old sea salts and other aged fellows, their tattoos look a bit strange as they reminisce about the war.
See I liked the tattoos on that Mike out of Neighbours in the film Memento cos they were useful – telling him who to kill and that. Maybe useful tattoos are the way forward.
DINLT – I agree that the wanton destruction of Dunblobbin is everything wot’s wrong with Broken Britain. How the hell can English Heritage call themselves protectors of our national heritage when one of our most important stately homes is being left at the mercy of these ‘ravers’. It’s Broken Britain Gone Mad is this.
he’s a good actor that Mike in Neighbours ain’t he? I thought he was good in LA Confidential.
Nap – yikes.
DINLT – definitely.
Nick – The list is tied, with Dave in a close second.
He is, DINLT, and he’s in the Hurt Locker too, though only for about the first two minutes
*possible spoiler*
You like films, don’t you Jamie?
He knows his films because he’s at Death’s door, Clarry. Scrounging along on benefits with only disturbing animal pornography and DVDs for company as he awaits Death’s icy embrace, he’s got fuck all better to do. The man’s a walking corpse, I tells you.
P.S Can’t remember what day I calculated would be the day we reached the glorious 100,000th comment. But I just redid my sums and reckon it’ll be on or around the 15th of May. Are we ahead of schedule?
*has actually marked it on the calendar with green highlighter*
I do like films Clarry, though not Avatar which I saw yesterday and gave me a headache which lasted for about 12 hours (the headache lasted 12 hours, not the film – the film lasted about 24 hours)
Oh dear – what’s up with Jamie? Is that why you all had to remind him to take his pills the other day, to stop him from dying?
*Clarry leaps to top of list*
I wear glasses too, so what does that say about me?
That’s a thing: if you’re in a same sex couple, and you look incredibly similar, do you ever have a flash of something…I dunno, a bit weird? Kind of like what I felt like when my mum really pointedly showed me pictures of my dad at Mr JRME’s age and they looked exactly the same?
Naps, have you ever considered working in a hospice. You’d be invaluable there.
It’d be nice if the 100,000th comment was:
Fck u, u cnuts!!!!!! u no nuffin bout 2 pints u fckin twats LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! u shud stop been jelluss u twats LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! twats!!!!!! ROFL!!!!
I am determined to be the 100,000th commenter and will destroy any such troll wot denies me this pleasure.
Maybe the 100,000th comment could be my last one before i keel over the computer monitor. I feel it would be a fitting farewell – I nominate Naps to deliver the eulogy.
Don’t say that, JFTTY!
I’ve considered many of the caring professions, Jamie. Cancer care to get ‘em to change their wills, paediatrics so I can hit kids, social work so I can take people’s kids off of ‘em (and then hit those kids), mental retardation hospitals so I can play jokes on the mad …
I could never be arsed to get the qualifications, that’s the thing. A shame really, I could have been Shipman 2.0 …
It’s ok Clarry – I’ve got a plan. I need a WWM rota of people reminding me to take my tablets every night so my heart doesn’t go haywire again like t’other day. I don’t want Naps on the rota though – he’s like an angel of death.
Well that’s rum, I must say. Here was me reminding you to take your pills at the wrong time so you’d end up kicking the … oh, right …
Phew! that’s ok then…
Anyway, gotta fly. Stacks of work to do.
BYE BYE
c u l8r Clarry.
No Friends .
Right, I woudl say it’s been fun but…
…anyway, cheerio. Up the Arsenal!
King of the Hill next week for those who care
Probably just me..
What’s that you say, Swineshead? You’ve lost your voice after going on a cigarette bender and I’ve gone deaf thanks to a build up of ear wax?
Doesn’t bode well for the podcast this week, eh?
*goes back to listening to things clearly*